OFFICIAL WEBSITE LA. RA. ANANTHAPADMANABAN
Official website of La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban — Explore stories
Official Website La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban, son of Sahitya Akademi Award winner La. Sa. Ramamirtham — Explore indexed storie
Official Website La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban, son of Sahitya Akademi Award winner La. Sa. Ramamirtham — Explore indexed storie

La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban is a quietly confident, observant, and emotionally intelligent Creative Writer | Quotes Composer, strategically perceptive and naturally skilled as a Naturally Tuned Prompt Engineer, crafting meaningful and thoughtful digital stories.
• "I like truth. People only like me if I act falsely; if I am truthful, they do
La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban is a quietly confident, observant, and emotionally intelligent Creative Writer | Quotes Composer, strategically perceptive and naturally skilled as a Naturally Tuned Prompt Engineer, crafting meaningful and thoughtful digital stories.
• "I like truth. People only like me if I act falsely; if I am truthful, they do not like me."
• "More people have loved me than the people I have loved."
• "I have an endless fascination with love. I keep trying to understand what it is, but I still cannot fully understand it."
• "One more thing I still do not understand: every love seems to come close to marriage, but it never reaches marriage. Why?"
• "I am searching for the answer to a question I keep asking myself."
• "Perhaps I am afraid of marriage. The people around me — my relatives, people I know — many of their marriages have failed. Even the women I once loved, their marriages also ended in failure."
• "That initial attraction of marriage seems to last only for few years After that, life becomes mechanical. But love is not supposed to be like that."
• "For me, love feels like something very serious. It is not a game. If you enter it, you must know how to come out of it as well."
• "Like the Chakravyuha — it is not enough to know how to enter; you must also know how to come out."
• "In love, many do not know that. When the story ends, at least ten years of your life may already be gone."
• "If someone says they love me, or if I begin to feel love for someone, I become afraid. This is the truth. I am not pretending."
• "My problem is that my self-respect is stronger than love."
• "Once, for the sake of love, I went against my own self-respect."
• "Other than that, my family raised me like a king."
• "This is what I think I have understood. I may be wrong. This is only what my small understanding has been able to grasp."
• "When I am happy, or even when I pretend to be happy, people do not seem to like it. But when I stay quiet, not speaking to anyone, as if I am sad, they seem happy."
• "I fell in love with English songs because of a girl. Her name was Sujatha. I have no idea where she is now. The first song I ever asked for was 'Hello' by Lionel Richie, and 'Ballerina Girl.' It was my first love when I was in sixth grade. I fell in love with Western music because of her."
• "She also introduced me to Russian novels. I still remember being twelve years old when I read 'Resurrection' by Leo Tolstoy. I was completely overwhelmed, almost frightened by the story. That story left me shaken and deeply affected. It was intense — I was lost in it, yet fascinated. I read many Russian novels, immersing myself in them."
• "While reading Russian novels, I came across Sujatha. I started with the story எப்பொழுதும் பெண் — kept exactly as Tamil. Then I read நிலா நிழல் — almost like my own life; I could not express love, I read it and was completely absorbed. After that, I started reading almost all the stories by Sujatha."
• "After that, I discovered Jayshree — through her, I learned what an English song really is, who the music director is, and the raga of the song. This sparked my interest in English movies, and I learned a lot in life because of her."
• "My interest in English movies grew. At first, I watched action films — Sylvester Stallone, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jean-Claude Van Damme. Gradually, I started watching thriller films, and little by little, I also watched romantic films. I fell in love with English movies."
• "I have an endless fascination with Tamil, English, and Hindi songs. I keep listening to them all the time, especially songs from 1970 to 2000. There is some kind of magic in them. I do not know what it is, but there is definitely magic in them."
• "I developed a deep fascination for Hindi songs. I fell in love with the music of
Laxmikant–Pyarelal
Shankar–Jaikishan
R. D. Burman
S. D. Burman
Naushad
O. P. Nayyar
Madan Mohan
Salil Chowdhury, along with Naadeem–Shravan,
Bappi Lahiri, Mohammed Rafi, Kishore Kumar, Asha Bhosle, Lata Mangeshkar, Kavita Krishnamurthy, and many others. Their songs filled my life with magic and emotion."
• "Then came Ilaiyaraaja. I was overwhelmed by his music and could never forget it. I consider the Ilaiyaraaja era the most remarkable period of my life."
• "Then came the movie 'Roja' by A. R. Rahman. Listening to that cassette amazed me. I remember it clearly — listened on a National Panasonic tape recorder at home. The speakers made it sound entirely different, and I was mesmerized by his music."
• "I have great faith in the Law of Attraction. Without even knowing it, I have been following the Law of Attraction for about ten or fifteen years. Almost everything I think about seems to happen. I do not know how it happens, but it happens."
• "I have read the book 'The Secret' many times. I do not even know how many times I have read it. The author of the book is Rhonda Byrne. Still, something happens when I follow it. I feel a certain peace of mind. Sometimes I even tested myself, wondering if I was just fooling myself. But I realized I am not fooling myself. It really happens."
• "I respect everyone who has loved me."
• "They never betrayed me in any way. They were beautiful, educated, cultured, and even wealthy. They loved me only for me."
• "Why they loved me, I do not know. I generally live a reserved life in this world."
• "Until now, nothing I wished for has happened. Why — I do not know."
• "During my school days, I wished for a simple life: a motorcycle, a wife, a house with a big hill behind it, a stream, and a small hotel where I could go to eat. I wished to live peacefully there with my wife, my child, my father, and my mother. And yet — it never happened."
• "I was just a below-average student. Higher studies never really appealed to me, and I don’t know how I studied at all. Somehow, I managed to get through."
• "I was brought up wonderfully. My parents knew exactly where to guide me, where to let me control things, and where not to interfere."
• "In our house, a servant maid raised me like her own child for over 30 years — truly, not just like a child, but as her own son. Similarly, for 35 years, an elderly woman brought milk to our home like a daily ritual."
• "Now, when I think of them, I realize I have never been able to give back to them. A sense of guilt lingers."
• "At that age, I understood, but I did not know how to express it. I have done nothing to repay them, and that sense of guilt will never leave me."
• "When I was in second grade, there was a girl in my class — I think she was taller than me. Even today, I have a fond memory of her, and her name appears in many of my stories. I prefer not to mention her name."
• "We studied together continuously until Plus Two. During Plus Two, she used to ride my Yamaha RX100, and she was scared of its speed. I still remember that vividly. And then, just like that, she disappeared from my life."
• "We never confessed love to each other — until the very end. Yet, I believe it was love. Somehow, I feel I made a mistake. I have missed many opportunities in life, many chances, much love — and I understand nothing when I think about life."
• "I have lived life without ever truly understanding what love really is. Many loves were unspoken, many confessed silently, and many were hidden — even today, I do not fully understand them."
• "I have kept her hair tie all these years. Even today, I have her sticker pottu on it. Her hair band, her hair pin — they are still with me. The sticker pottu remains on the mirror — the mirror where I see my face every day. That mirror has aged, and my reflection may not be perfectly clear, many houses have changed since then, but my memory of her remains fresh. I have kept that mirror exactly as it was. That mirror is where I see my face today."
• "All these — the valayal, ribbon, kolusu, mookkuthi — are memories I have carefully kept. In my stories, they appear under different titles — valayal, ribbon, kolusu, mookkuthi — yet they all tell the story of the same girl. Each story is different, but the love is the same. Sticker pottu."
• "I have always been puzzled by life. Everyone around me — friends, peers, acquaintances — many of them are married, tired, worn out. At my age, those same people seem to lead mechanical lives, bound by EMIs, responsibilities, and worries."
• "And yet — for me, life seems to be just beginning. At this stage of my life, only now many people are expressing love towards me, telling me or understanding silently, trying to make me understand without saying anything, expressing love in ways I cannot understand. How and why this happens — even I do not know. It feels like life itself has only now begun for me."
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Background & Qualifications
Though highly qualified in Computer Science, holding multiple global certifications, La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban chose the path of a Creative Writer | Quotes Composer, blending technology, logic, and emotion in his writing.
Certificates & Technical Education
• Software Engineering
• Computer Programming and Application (U.K.)
• Certified Professional in Oracle Database Administration
• Certified Professional in Oracle (Forms, Reports, PL/SQL, Application & Database Development)
• Certified Professional in Cisco Router Administration
• Microsoft Certified Technology Specialist (MCTS)
• Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer
• Microsoft Certified Professional
• Multiple Microsoft Certifications
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La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban – Introvert & Village Soul
• He is an introverted Creative Writer | Quotes Composer and a true village soul
• deeply connected to his grandmother’s home in Varagur
• the Perumal Temple
• and the big well
• Since childhood, he has been seeing and cherishing these places
• which feature prominently in many of his stories
• reflecting his lifelong bond with his village and its temple
• He seeks a quiet life — without disturbing or being disturbed
La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban – Family & Core Values
• He cared deeply for his parents, La. Sa. Ramamirtham and Hymavathi, standing beside them with love and dignity until their final moments
Principles of True Love:
• Believes that true love means staying — not walking away — when they need you most.
• "Never abandon your parents. When you were born, they didn’t throw you away — do not send them to an old age home."
• "Those who scold you are the ones who care about you most."
La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban – Core Message:
Recurring Themes: Love appears again and again — not as fantasy, but as truth.
Varied Emotions: Love that fails. Love that returns.
Cultural Flavor: Like masala dosa or pongal, it never loses its flavor.
Quiet Mastery: Even when broken, we reach for it again — captured with quiet grace.
La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban – NRI Life & Reflections:
NRI Experience: Chasing the American dream inspired much of his writing.
Emotional Cost: Writes about longing, loneliness, and the ache of absence.
Silent Sacrificers: Many NRIs live far from their land, food, people, and festivals.
• "We eat hot food in our land. Over there, we reheat and eat."
• "We came with dreams, stayed for dollars. Lost the years, lost ourselves. One-way road. No U-turn."
La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban – Literary Inspirations:
• Leo Tolstoy: Emotional realism, depth of human experience.
• Sujatha: Storytelling pace, narrative clarity.
• Impact on Writing: Their influence shaped his honest, character-driven style, blending emotional truth with compelling narratives.
La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban – Cultural Favorites & Lifestyle:
• Food: Pongal, vadai, masala dosa, sambar vadai, onion sambar, potato poriyal, mullu kathirikai kara kari, poritha kottu, rasam, parupu usili, parupu thogay
In West Virginia, he finds another world — rolling green hills, gentle rivers, and cascading waterfalls where peace comes easy.
Varagur gives him warmth and family, Mylapore gives him life, first love, and music, and West Virginia gives him quiet wonder.
For Srikanth, the three places he loves most in the world are, in order: Varagur, Mylapore, and West Virginia.
• He seeks a quiet life — without disturbing or being disturbed
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la.ra.ananthapadmanaban – Far From Home
• Chasing the American dream inspired much of his writing
la.ra.ananthapadmanaban – Emotional Cost
• Writes about longing, loneliness, and the ache of absence
• la.ra.ananthapadmanaban still has faith in love, yet is afraid to fall in love, and afraid to be loved.
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la.ra.ananthapadmanaban – Silent Sacrificers
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• Many people live far from their land, food, loved ones, and festivals
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• “We eat hot food in our land. Over there, we reheat and eat.”
• “We came with dreams, stayed for dollars. Lost the years, lost ourselves. One-way road. No U-turn.”
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La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban – Life
• I am a pure vegetarian
• I don’t smoke
• I don’t drink
• I write with my left hand
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Born and raised in the city, yet his heart always walks toward his grandmother’s village, Varagur, where he draws inspiration for his Tamil creative writing, including his collection of inspiring quotes and emotional short stories.
la.ra.ananthapadmanaban still has faith in love, yet is afraid to fall in love, and afraid to be loved.
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© Copyrigh Laraananthapadmanaban.com – All Rights Reserved

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. I am a man of a complex, layered personality; life has often felt unfair, but I have grown used to it.
• To some extent, I remain true to my original self.
• There is always a feeling that something is missing in my life.
• I consider myself a successful failure.
• No guts, no glory; this is a mantra I
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. I am a man of a complex, layered personality; life has often felt unfair, but I have grown used to it.
• To some extent, I remain true to my original self.
• There is always a feeling that something is missing in my life.
• I consider myself a successful failure.
• No guts, no glory; this is a mantra I live by.
For Srikanth to remain in love, she must stay distant from him; the moment she comes closer, his love fades.
• I embrace a reckless, carefree, and worry-free life, shaped by self-doubt, self-examination, self-correction, self-redesign, self-reinvention, and a restless spirit, along with a bit of good fortune.
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La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban – Inspiration from Women
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• All women in my emotional short stories are incredibly strong characters who have shaped my perspective.
• They share a deep connection with me—my sister, my mother, some ex-lovers, our servant maid who worked in my home for 25 years and raised me like her own child, and the very old woman who brought milk to our home for 30 years.
• I feel a deep respect for them, which reflects in my writing.
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• In one way or another — I am always being loved by someone.
• Love is what drives me.
• Either I love someone or someone loves me —
and until today, this is how my life has always moved.
• I am afraid of love.
• I fear to love someone.
• I fear being loved by someone.
• I cannot survive another breakup.
• My heart cannot take another shattering.
• Mine is already held together with invisible bandages —
patched, taped, stitched,
and yet — still bleeding in silence.
• How much pain can it survive?
• Is it not a pity… to let it break again?
• Someone is always loving me in their own silent way.
• Sometimes they come and say it.
• Sometimes they reveal it indirectly —
a gift, a meal (chocolate, cake, dress, mobile),
a gesture, a small act of care,
a quiet offering of affection.
• If they know my health is not well,
they notice it and take care in their own subtle, indirect way.
• I am always loved. Even today — still.
• They may be searching my name somewhere.
• They may be watching my life from a distance.
• In some unknown way — I know it.
• In some unexplainable way — I feel it.
• Why I sense it, I do not know.
• But I can feel it — always.
• Some lovers have returned.
• Some loves have simply vanished.
• Some came and left like passing seasons.
• And some — remain far away, watching me from a distance.
• All of this — I somehow know.
• I can feel it.
• I don’t know how, but my heart always senses it.
• Love is everything to me.
• That is why — in my stories — love is always the most important element.
• Because love is that important in my life.
• Every woman I loved — every lover I had — all of them were strong characters.
• They were good people.
• No one betrayed me.
• No one double-crossed me.
• No one ever loved me for money — they loved me for me.
• We only separated — that’s all.
• No cheating. No lies.
• Honestly — I am happy.
• Yes — separation hurts, pain is real…
• but still I must say this truth:
• I was lucky.
• Still lucky — even today I am loved.
• Many of them may have married someone else,
• but I know — in some corner of their heart,
• I once lived there… and maybe — I still live there.
• And for that love — I thank them.
• Truly, I am grateful.
• I thank everyone who loved this reckless, careless, worthless, useless, unworthy me.
• I am sincerely happy.
• The separation brought pain, yes — but no one ever betrayed me.
• I was lucky.
• Lucky to have loved and been loved by sincere, true-hearted women.
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© Copyrigh Laraananthapadmanaban.com – All Rights Reserved
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La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban – Music Knowledge
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• My strong knowledge of Western music, Hindi music, and Tamil music from 1970 to 2000 significantly influences my emotional short stories, adding depth to my narratives.
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La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban – Favourite Music Bands & Artists
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• My favorite Western music bands and artists include:
• Boney M
• ABBA
• Bee Gees
• The Corrs
• Roxette
• Cliff Richard
• Lionel Richie
• Tina Arena
• Cyndi Lauper
• Baccara
• Aerosmith
• Michael learns to rock
• Michael Jackson
• DJ Stella
• Cathy Dennis
• George Michael
• Wham
• Pet Shop Boys
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La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban – Teenage Dreams
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• In my youth, I dreamt of marrying Steffi Graf, Gabrielle Sabatini, or ABBA lead singer Agnetha Fältskog.
• I never had much interest in studying; I was a below-average student, especially when it came to learning software.
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La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban – Self Reflection
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• I have faced many failures and lost love multiple times throughout my life.
• I spent many days crying, but I would calm myself, gather strength, and rise again.
• I am a man who motivates himself and pushes beyond his limits, despite my heavy heart and the tear always at the corner of my eye.
• I love to write stories above all else. My anger, dreams, love, desire, and disappointment—all find their voice only through stories. This is the only thing I truly enjoy; nothing else captivates me.
• I write stories to escape depression and to find relief from my inner struggles.
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La. Ra. Ananthapadmanaban – Purpose of Writing
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• Writing tests my limits and pushes me to explore how far I can take my creativity.
• Writing is where I experience joy, love, pain, sorrow, longing, and peace, allowing me to reinvent myself.
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© Copyrigh Laraananthapadmanaban.com – All Rights Reserved

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la.ra.ananthapadmanaban – Stories:
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Bayam Series
1. பயம் 1 – Bayam 1
2. வேட்டை பயம் II – Vettai Bayam II
3. தொடருபவள் பயம் III – Thodarubaval Bayam III
Akka Series
4. அக்கா Part 1 – Akka Part 1
5. அக்கா Part 2 – Akka Part 2
6. அக்கா Part 3 – Akka Part 3
7. அக்கா Part 4 – Akka Par
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la.ra.ananthapadmanaban – Stories:
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Bayam Series
1. பயம் 1 – Bayam 1
2. வேட்டை பயம் II – Vettai Bayam II
3. தொடருபவள் பயம் III – Thodarubaval Bayam III
Akka Series
4. அக்கா Part 1 – Akka Part 1
5. அக்கா Part 2 – Akka Part 2
6. அக்கா Part 3 – Akka Part 3
7. அக்கா Part 4 – Akka Part 4
8. அக்கா Part 5 – Akka Part 5
9. அக்கா Part 6 – Akka Part 6
10. அக்கா Part 7 – Akka Part 7
11. அக்கா Part 8 – Akka Part 8
Vidhya Series
12. வித்யா – Vidhya
13. வித்யா II – Vidhya II
Thanimai Series
14. தனிமை – Thanimai
15. பிலடெல்பியா – Piladelphia – Thanimai Part II
16. தானம் தனிமை III – Thaanam Thanimai III
Darthy Series
17. டார்த்தி Part 1 – Darthy Part 1
18. டார்த்தி Part II – Darthy Part II
Thiyagam Series
19. தியாகம் – Thiyagam
20. வெஸ்ட் வெர்ஜீனியா – West Virginia – Thiyagam Part 2
Pilot Series
21. பைலட் 1 – Pilot 1
22. தாமினி பைலட் 2 – Thamini Pilot 2
23. கல்யாண் மித்தாலி பைலட் 3 – Kalyan Mithali Pilot 3
Standalone / Other Stories
24. உறுதுணை – Uru Thunai
25. யுகங்கள் – Yugangal
26. அடையாளம் – Adaialam
27. ஹேமாவதி – Hymavathi
28. உண்மையான பொய் – Unmaiyana Poi
29. அவள் – Aval
30. வந்தனா – Vandhana
31. நீலவேணி – Neelaveni
32. வாழ்க்கை – Vaazhkai
33. அன்பளிப்பு – Anbalippu
34. அப்பராஜிதா – Aparajitha
35. மண் – Mann
36. நியூயார்க் நகரம் – New York Nagaram
37. வீணாகிப் போன நாட்கள் – Veenagip Pona Naadgal
38. டோரத்தி – Dorothy
39. தந்திரன் – Thandhiran
40. மதுமிதா – Madhumitha
41. என் தங்கை – En Thangai
42. நிலைத்தவள் – Nilaiththaval
43. அரண்யா – Aranya
44. பத்மஜா – Padmaja
45. வராகூர் – Varagur
46. தேடல் – Thedal
47. வினையை அறுப்பவள் – Vinaiyai Aruppaval
48. புறக்கணிக்கப்பட்டவன் – Purakkanikkappattavan
49. இறைவனுக்கு நன்றி – Iraivanukku Nandri
50. சஞ்சனா – Sanjana
51. இப்படிக்கு காலம் – Ippadikku Kaalam
52. ரிஷ்மா – Rishma
53. இஷானி – Ishani
54. ஆற்றல் – Aatral
55. என் அன்புள்ள நண்பனே – En Anbulla Nanbane
56. ரயில் நட்பு – Rayil Natpu
57. முதல் பிரசவம் – Mudhal Prasavam
58. இரவல் உயிர் – Iraval Uyir
59. அன்விகா – Anvika
60. என் அப்பாவின் காதல் – En Appavin Kadhal
61. மீண்டும் அந்த நாட்களுக்கு – Meendum Andha Naadgalukku
62. முன்னா – Munna
63. புலம் மாற்றியவன் – Pulam Maatriyavan
64. வெற்றி வேட்டை – Vetri Vettai
65. கன்யா – கன்னியாகுமரி – Kanya Kanniyakumari
66. முதல் முத்தம் – Mudhal Mutham
67. தூதுவன் – Thoothuvan
68. வலி – Vali
69. இதுவும் கடந்து போகும் – Idhuvum Kadandhu Pogum
70. ராஜுவின் கடைசி தினம் – Rajuvin Kadaisi Dhinam
71. கண்கள் – Kangal
72. தடுமாறும் இதயங்கள் – Thadumaarum Idhayangal
73. சுஹானி – Suhani
74. வைஷ்ணவி – Vaishnavi
75. ஜோனத்தன் – Jonathan
76. தந்தை – Thandhai
77. ரிப்பன் – Ribbon
78. சபரீனா – Sabrina
79. கொலுசு – Kolusu
80. மூக்குத்தி – Mookkuthi
81. வளையல் – Valaiyal
82. என்னுடையவள் – Ennudaiyaval
83. கானல் நீர் – Kanaal Neer
84. ஒரு பிராயச்சித்தம் – Oru Praayachitham
85. சந்தோஷம் – Santhosham
86. ரோஷினி – Roshini
87. கேரளத்தில் எங்கேயோ – Keralathil Engeyo
88. சந்துரு – Chandru
89. உத்ரா – Uthra
90. உயிர்கள் – Uyirgal
91. டாரிகா – Tharika
92. நிராசை – Niraasai__
93. விருட்சம் (Vrucham)
94. வயலினிஸ்ட் (Violinist)
95. ஹர்ஷா (Harsha)
96. காதலி (Kaadhali)
97. ரிப்பன் (Ribbon)
98. மதுமிதா (Madhumitha)
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These emotional short stories are a vital part of Tamil creative writing, resonating deeply with readers and weaving a rich tapestry of narratives. Additionally, for those seeking inspiration, the site features a collection of inspiring quotes that beautifully complement these emotional short stories, enhancing the overall reading experience.
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• "If I am not available when someone is looking for me, it means they did not value me when I was around."
• "If Srikanth is not available now when someone is looking for him, it means they did not value him when he was around."
• "I don’t understand how many people have hurt me in the name of love, or how many
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• "If I am not available when someone is looking for me, it means they did not value me when I was around."
• "If Srikanth is not available now when someone is looking for him, it means they did not value him when he was around."
• "I don’t understand how many people have hurt me in the name of love, or how many times I have had to rise again from failure."
• "I don’t understand. One moment someone falls in love suddenly, the next they appear suddenly, then they are suddenly with me, and then suddenly they disappear. Is it me who is wrong, or is it them?"
• "Someone comes into my life unexpectedly, showers love suddenly, stays with me, and then disappears without a word. They give me happiness, fear, sorrow, and worry all at once. How much more can I endure?"
• "I don’t understand why someone loves me. In my life, there was only one person I called love, and that ended. She did not even value me. But how many people love me now? What am I supposed to do?"
• "I agree that love feels good. I wonder how many people can truly love. Sometimes I go along with love, but in my heart, there is no love. At those times, I have to act a certain way, and I don’t even like myself then."
• "If I speak the truth, they distance themselves from me. If I lie, they stay with me. I don’t understand anything."
• "I see clearly, they leave me, yet come back. Why do they break my heart? Why does it shatter into two pieces every time? How many times can I remember this? How many breaks can my mind endure?"
• "They appear suddenly in my life, then disappear. After ten years, they return again, then leave once more. Suddenly, they search for me. After twenty-five years, I still don’t understand anything."
• "My heart has been patched up, stitched many times. So many scars are pressed into it. The heart has no strength left for that heart, it is not ready for humiliation, yet there is still trust in love. That is the biggest problem for this heart."
• "Ever since school-college, people have loved me silently, but no one ever told me. After I broke, no one showed me love. Just when I think almost everything is gone, they all come back, using the word ‘love’. I don’t understand life."
• "When I gave up on life and lived in sorrow, no one was there. Not even one person noticed me, not even someone to ask why. I wandered like an orphan. But suddenly people come into my middle age, suddenly say they love me, say I am everything to them, suddenly show affection, suddenly live with me, and then one day suddenly disappear. Is this what love is called?"
• "Someone suddenly gives gifts, suddenly shows affection, suddenly cooks and serves me food, and if I fall sick cares for me like a mother. But then suddenly disappears. I don’t understand."
• "Someone says I am their world, that I am the most important and that they need no one else. Then without a word they marry someone else and disappear for ten years. Later they call me crying that their marriage has failed, come to see me and say they could have married me instead. And then once again, they disappear."
• "I still remember one thing. In those days I had only ten rupees for petrol, and I had a Yamaha RX100. A masala dosa cost ten rupees. Thanya, who studied with me, I told her I had already eaten, even though I had not, and bought her a masala dosa with that ten rupees. Today, petrol and a masala dosa each cost roughly 100 rupees or more."
• "In my life, there are some people I can never forget. They were always around, studied with me, went to school together from first grade to twelfth grade. Whatever we did, we did it together. I haven’t even forgotten their names. Where is everyone now, and how were we back then?"
• "Even today, there are some people I know. They have my phone number and I have theirs. I have even lived in their house. When we were young, during festivals like Deepavali and Pongal, they came to my home with their families. Some studied in my class, some in other classes. But today, we both act as if we don’t know each other. When I think about it, I feel ashamed."
• "Now, even if I try to reach out, those relationships don’t hold. It feels awkward. If I love someone now, or if someone loves me, they get jealous. I don’t understand. What connection do they have with me, and I with them?"
• "They have contact with my sister, talk to her about me, but no one asks me directly. Everything they want to know about me goes through my sister. I don’t understand why."
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